Weird Toys Not To Be Found Under The Tree This Christmas

Back in the days before Heath & Safety regulations, when naive innocence beat-out any concerns harm coming to your children through the toys you bought them. That you lovingly wrapped and merrily placed under the Christmas tree, all excited to see their glowing little faces of joy on Christmas Day. In those heady days of lead toy soldiers beautifully painted with lead paint for extra measure of poisoning. When there was no conception of warning parents of toys containing little bits that their kids could swallow. After all who'd be stupid enough to  put bit of plastic of metal in their mouths? When educational science toys contained real chemicals and even radioactive materials for little Tommy to experiment on. When parents weren't paranoid and kids could be kids.
The Gilbert U-238 Atomic Energy Lab was a toy lab set that was produced by the A.C. Gilbert Company in 1950. This lab's intention was to allow children to create and watch chemical reactions using actual radioactive material. The kit came complete with samples of Uranium ore. But if the samples that you got were not enough for your little Edward Teller, you could reorder more radioactive source material, that would likely get you put on a watch list as a potential terrorist these days. 

A product catalogue describes it as follows: "Produces awe-inspiring sights! Enables you to actually SEE the paths of electrons and alpha particles traveling at speeds of more than 10,000 miles per SECOND! Electrons racing at fantastic velocities produce delicate, intricate paths of electrical condensation--beautiful to watch. Viewing Cloud Chamber action is closest man has come to watching the Atom!"
Kaba Kick is basically a Japanese version of that old fun game Russian Roulette, but for kids rather than psychotic maniacs. The player points the gun at his or her own head and pulls the trigger. Instead of bullets, a pair of feet kick out from the barrel (which being bizarre and Japanese are of course shaped like a pink hippo). If the gun doesn't fire, the player earns points. If it does, the player gets a kick in the head. 

I suppose at least when little Takumi grows-up and gets embroiled in real games of Russian Roulette with the Yakuza, he'll know what he's doing. 
Mixing dangerous extremes of temperature with a children's toys, is never a good idea. Hence why people often gave the Easy-Bake Oven a hard time, because it had a light-bulb inside to heat and bake food, and give kids a bit of a nasty burn. But the Easy-Bake Oven was a beacon of safety compared to the original electric Thingmaker Creepy Crawlers oven of the 1960s, which employed heating metal moulds to such a temperature that melted plastic. Not only that, to add insult to potential injury, the plastic gave off toxic fumes. So little Tommy could breath in the toxic fumes, and fall unconscious face-first into a pool of molten plastic. Okay maybe that's pushing the realms of possibility, but the Thingmaker Creepy Crawlers did have a reputation for causing burns to kids who didn't follow the scant safety instructions. Instead of trying to make their own plastic insect toys, parents should have just skipped the dangerous do-it-yourself toy making kit and just simply bought them a bag of made-in-China plastic insects instead.
The Austin Magic Pistol, circa 1950s, worked by mixing "magic crystals" and water in the back of the gun. By "magic crystals" they really meant was "calcium carbide", a highly volatile chemical that creates a flammable gas when mixed with water. With a few spoonfuls of calcium carbide and a few drops of water, turned it into a jet propelled high velocity gun. Firing balls up to 70 feet away! That's right, the whole working premise of the Austin Magic Pistol was that little Tommy created an explosive chemical reaction in the back of the gun he held in his delicate little hand, released by pressing the trigger. Causing a fire-ball to expel out of the end of the gun, firing the projectile across the backyard. 
Xmas Games: Festive Freebies & Christmas Cassettes - In the heady days of early home computing, magazines often gave away festive themed cassettes to get us in the holiday spirit.
Take Off That Christmas Jumper, It's Not Ironic You Just Look A Twat! - Tis' the season for usually sane people to blow money on clothing they will only wear once, in order to look like an idiot.
Santa Theme Park In California - Sat in the mountains of Southern California, Santa's Village was the first ever franchised theme park. Opened in 1955, a month before Disneyland.
The Best Of The Worst Weird Christmas Movies - Let this be a warning to you. Clicking on this link means you are exposing yourself to some of the worst movies of all time. Happy Christmas!
Bad Santa: 12 Creepy Christmas Clauses - From a drunk department store Santa to a happy hirsute hobo. We all love a dishevelled dude in a Santa suit. 
The Dark Side Of European Christmas Traditions - Across Europe there are many dark and creepy figures associated with Christmas, whose folklore origins stem from pagan winter celebrations.
Top Ten: Christmas Slasher Movies - A festive season sub-genre of the slasher movie genre. And one that in many ways started it all with 1974's Black Christmas.
William S. Burroughs: The Junky's Christmas - A dark take of heroin addiction and redemption, in a short story my Burroughs. Later made into a short film produced by Francis Ford Coppola.